


What Is Good In This World

by padfootagain



Category: British Actor RPF
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Romantic Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-14
Updated: 2018-12-14
Packaged: 2019-09-18 09:26:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16992390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/padfootagain/pseuds/padfootagain
Summary: You come back from work after a shitty day. But Ben is here to make you feel better.





	What Is Good In This World

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote this for an event on tumblr :  
> 6\. “I need a hug.”  
> 8\. “The world is a mess. But you’re not.”  
> 11\. “Let’s take a walk and talk this whole thing through.”  
> 50\. “Perhaps I never speak about myself because there’s nothing to tell. Or perhaps I’m just trying to protect you… or myself… or both of us.”

You stopped fighting against yourself and grabbed the bottle of very good whiskey Ben kept hidden in the kitchen for special occasions, and you poured yourself another glass of alcohol. You brought the glass up to your lips, letting the cold glass rest on your lower lip until it felt numb, before taking a gulp. You let the liquid burn your throat, wincing slightly at the bitter sensation but enjoying it all the same.

You had had a shitty.

If you were to be honest with yourself, you had had a shitty week.

Long days at work, your job haunting your dreams and waking you up in the middle of the night, this constant lump in your throat, this stress that was eating you alive…

You took a deep breath, before exhaling loudly, letting yourself fall back onto the couch, looking up at the ceiling.

You felt like shit.

Your boss had shouted on you. Your boss had been a bitch, actually.

You felt like you were just shit…

You finished your drink, clenching your jaw.

You tried to find a positive thought, but failed miserably.

“Hi, baby!”

You didn’t move when Ben entered the room, a smile on his face and a pizza box in his hand.

“I found your favourite!” he said, all proud of himself as he put down the pizza on the table and finally unzipped his leather jacket.

He frowned at the sight of you sitting there, motionless on the sofa, your head thrown back towards the ceiling, holding an empty glass in your hand, his best bottle of whiskey open on the ground next to you.

“Babe? You’re okay?” he asked slowly, taking off his jacket and throwing it on a nearby chair while he walked closer to you.

“Yeah, yeah… I’m fine,” you answered, but even in your ears, your voice sounded fake.

“What’s wrong?”

He sat down on the couch next to you.

You heaved a sigh.

“Nothing important.”

You made a movement to grab the bottle again, but Ben was faster.

“Now, we both know it’s not the solution to whatever problem you have,” he said softly, putting the alcohol away.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“It generally helps though. _Let’s take a walk and talk this whole thing through._ What do you think about that?” he asked, his voice low and warm, his caress reassuring as he held your hand in his.

But you shook your hand, still avoiding his stare.

“I don’t want to go out,” you breathed. “I don’t want to do anything…”

Ben frowned even more. Your voice sounded like your mind was far away…

“Love, what’s wrong?” he asked again. “You have to tell me.”

“Leave me alone,” you whispered.

But Ben shook his head, cupping your cheek in his large hand, forcing you to finally meet his eyes. Those beautiful eyes you loved so much and never failed to capture your soul, making the whole world around you disappear.

“You seem so sad,” he said slowly. “I’m worried. Did I do something wrong?”

A sad smile formed on your lips.

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong,” you reassured him.

“Why don’t you want to tell me then?”

You shrugged.

“It’s nothing…”

“It can’t be nothing. You wouldn’t look so sad if it was nothing.”

“I don’t need to talk about it, Ben.”

He exhaled loudly.

“What do you need then?” he asked, brushing his thumb against your lower lip. “What can I do to put a smile on those soft lips of yours again?”

You gave him a small smile, before nodding, giving in.

“ _I need a hug,_ ” you answered.

Ben smiled, his eyes glimmering with both tenderness and amusement. He opened his arms for you, and you quickly let yourself fall against him, resting your head in the crook of his neck. You could feel him dropping sweet kisses in your hair, and you couldn’t refrain a smile. His arms wrapped around you, one of his hand cradling the back of your neck while the other stroked soothingly your back. You let out a sigh, and soon he could feel you relaxing against him, your muscles growing numb under his soft touch.

He kissed your temple, his short beard tickling your sensitive skin.

“Do you feel better?” he asked in a whisper.

You nodded, holding his black shirt.

“I always feel better in your arms,” you answered, your tone matching his.

He let out a chuckle.

“Is it a superpower of mine?” he asked, smiling.

“I reckon it is,” you giggled.

You kissed his neck, feeling him shivering under your lips, before letting your head rest on his shoulder again.

“I always feel… so safe in your arms,” you whispered, and Ben froze at the sound of the honesty in your voice. “Warm and safe. As if nothing could happen to me. As if… you could make the whole world disappear.”

“You are safe with me, Y/N,” he whispered in your ear, his warm breath tickling your skin. “You’re safe. I’m here.”

You sniffed, and he could feel tears falling in his shoulder and wetting his shirt now. But you couldn’t help it. After this awful week, you just couldn’t take any more of it. You felt like you were about to break, you had to release all this pressure that crushed your heart or the organ would stop beating. You had to make this lump leave your throat, or you would suffocate. You needed to let all this stress and sadness and pain out of your system or you would die of it…

Ben tightened his hold on you, kissing your hair again.

“Love, no… please, don’t cry,” he whispered, cradling you in his arms, his touch delicate, as if you were made of glass and he was scared to break you. “Please, sweetheart. Don’t cry.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck, holding him even closer to you.

“It’s alright,” he said softly, rocking you gently as he would have done to ease a crying child, his lips resting on your temple. “Babe, it’s alright. Stop crying. I can’t see you cry…”

You sniffed, trying to free yourself from his embrace, suddenly ashamed to have freed your tears before him, but Ben didn’t let you leave his arms.

“You have to talk to me, love,” he said, cupping your cheek and forcing you to look up at him again. “You have to let me help you, okay?”

He dried your cheeks with his thumbs.

“You don’t have to always act like you’re the strongest human being on the planet, you know?” he went on. “It’s okay if something went wrong and you’re sad about it, if you’re stressed… I’m here to help, so talk to me.”

You shrugged.

“I just… I don’t want to talk about this.”

“Why not?

You shrugged again, fleeing his intense dark eyes, while he still softly brushed your cheeks with his thumbs, even if your skin was dried again.

” _Perhaps I never speak about myself because there’s nothing to tell,_ “ you said softly, your voice almost a whisper _._ ” _Or perhaps I’m just trying to protect you… or myself… or both of us._ “

He frowned.

"Why would you have to protect me?”

You shrugged, and he took your chin between his fingers to make sure you would not flee his gaze again.

“You don’t have to protect me against anything, love,” he said.

“You have other things to worry about…”

“I have nothing else in the world to worry about but you,” he interrupted you.

You both remained motionless for a moment, staring at each other, and you felt like you wanted to cry again.

But you gave in. Maybe he was right. Maybe you didn’t have to always look strong. Maybe you had the right to be fragile too sometimes…

“I had an awful week,” you said, heaving a sigh. “I’m so stressed and… I don’t know… I’m just… I feel like… like everything is blurred and I don’t know where to go next. I feel lost. I feel like I’m not strong enough. I feel like shit.”

“Come here,” Ben said, drawing you closer to him again. “You need another hug.”

You chuckled, wrapping your arms around him again.

“I just feel like… like I’m not good enough,” you confessed, and you felt him tighten his hold on you, cradling your head in his large palm again. “I feel like I don’t deserve you, like I don’t deserve all this…”

“Now, stop it,” he interrupted you. “Of course you deserve me. You’re wonderful. You’re amazing, Y/N. Stop thinking this of yourself, because all of it is wrong.”

“I feel… like a mess,” you whispered.

But Ben shook his head, pulling away just enough to be able to look down at you.

“Love, you’re all wrong here. You can’t think all this about yourself, because none of this is true. You’re wonderful. You’re the kindest and the bravest human being I’ve ever met. You’re not a mess. You just work too much these days, and it’s not good for you. My baby, look at me…”

He took your face in his hands when you tried to look away again, before resuming his speech.

“You’re not lost. You’re not weak. You’re not a mess. You’re just tired. You’re just too brave for your own good. You’re just afraid that someone could see that you’re fragile too, but it’s okay to be fragile, baby. It just means that you’re human. It’s not your fault if you’re sad, it’s just that you have to slow down and work a bit less. Your job is too stressful. Your boss is an arse. And this world… this whole world, Y/N it’s just… _The world is a mess. But you’re not._ And even if you’re right, even if you’re really a mess, it doesn’t matter. I love this mess of yours.”

You closed your eyes, feeling a smile curling up your lips.

“Do you really think that?” you asked in a shaking whisper, opening your eyes again, just to let them get trapped by Ben’s dark glance.

“Of course I do,” he smiled, nodding. “You know I do. Come on, baby, you have to stop crying. You’re breaking my heart now…”

You tried to chase the tears away, in vain.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

“What are you sorry for?” you asked, letting him dry your cheeks again.

He shrugged.

“I don’t know, it’s just… If you feel that way… perhaps I’m not good enough at showing you how much you mean to me.”

“Oh, no… no, baby,” you shook your head, running your hands through his hair. “No, you… you make me feel special, you really do. You’re perfect, it’s not about you, it’s about me, that’s all…”

“But what is about you is about me as well. We’re a team, right?”

You chuckled.

“Yeah, yeah, we’re a team but… it’s not you. On the contrary. You’re saving me. You keep on saving me over and over again.”

He stared intensely at you.

“Don’t hide all this from me again,” he said firmly. “I’m here for you, you know that, right? Let me help.”

You nodded.

“I’m sorry,” you breathed, but he shook his head.

“Don’t be. Just… just let me reach you. You don’t have to build walls around yourself when you’re with me. You’re safe with me.”

You smiled, nodding.

“I know I am.”

You exchanged a smile. And you finally noticed that the knot in your stomach was gone. The lump in your throat had disappeared. You felt calmer now.

“Need another hug?” Ben asked, opening his arms for you again.

You laughed.

“Aren’t you tired of giving me free hugs like that?” you replied.

“Okay, first : I never said that they were free hugs, I expect some kind of retribution… a kind of retribution that requires a bed and both of us being naked,” he answered, making you laugh, a frank, earnest laugh that was now lighting up your features. “And second : I am never tired of hugging you. I love hugging you.”

“Oh, I bet you do!”

“I do. And I know that _you_ love hugging me too.”

“You’re not as charming as you think.”

“Oh, I am.”

You both laughed, but you wrapped your arms around him once more anyway.

You remained motionless for a moment, both of you silent. You took a deep breath, memorizing his smell you already had carved into your mind, running deep under your skin.

“I love you, Ben,” you whispered against the skin of his neck.

You could feel him smile into your hair.

“I love you too, Y/N,” he said, his tone matching yours. “I love you more than anything in this world. You’re everything that is good in this world.”

You shook your head, a tender smile on your lips.

“You are everything that is good in this world for me too. Promise me you’ll keep making this whole world a brighter place by staying by my side, Ben…”

“I promise. No way you’re getting rid of me that easily, I’m warning you.”

“Good, ‘cause I don’t intend to make it easy for you to leave either.”

He ran a hand through your hair, and you sighed faintly under his soft touch.

“Oh, my baby… I don’t intend to ever leave you anyway…”


End file.
